She came to us on a Friday. So scared and shy we literally had to take the screws out of the carrier and lift her out of it. It took less than a minute for her to capture our hearts.
Cavalier Rescue USA was taking her with us to get a heart x-ray as just as we were set to adopt she started to cough (she was a grade 3/4 heart murmur at the time) and they wanted to make sure she didn’t have fluid in lungs. They wanted us to go in with eyes wide open. While no fluid was in the lungs they did suggest we have her checked out by a cardiologist since her heart was large.
Cavalier Rescue USA tried to explain to us that taking in a dog with congestive heart failure is very costly (they are not wrong) and is heartbreaking, while not discouraging us to adopt her just wanted us to be fully aware. It was too late…just hours into knowing her we were fully in love. My husband simply said we will show her the best life we can for however long we have with her. And that’s what we set out to do.
We went to the cardiologist (a wonderful man) less than a week after getting her and it was confirmed that while no fluid in the lungs she was indeed starting into congestive heart failure and would need to be medicated. He also gave her about a year to live. Our hearts sank a little but again we pledged to make it the best year ever then. It turned out he would be right.
It was a year of ups and downs of responding well to the meds and getting her lifespan expectation extended and then shortened again this August. It was a year of all our furniture being covered in cloth pee pads that got washed daily, taking daily respiratory rates, listening to daily coughing, $200 in monthly meds, and $700 cardiologist visits, checking at night to see if she is still breathing and hoping each morning when you woke that she was there.
We would do it all again in a heartbeat.
Holly was a gentle, shy, happy, and loving soul who over our year with us bloomed and came out of her shell. She went from hiding under my arm at cavalier meet ups to frolicking with other cavaliers and wandering around sniffing and exploring.
A daddy’s girl though loved her mom so very much too, she slept on her daddy’s pillow each night.
Hunter of squirrels and small birds, knowing to never mess with crows as they were bad news. She loved walks outside, especially ones where squirrels would be. 🙂
Chowhound.
She was a lover of Christmas trees lighted up (never having seen one before us…her past was not the best). Last year our tree was up until April just for her. We put it back up just this last Friday, just in time as it turns out.
She was a fierce lover of cheese and as many of you saw on Instagram the kind people at Cabot Cheese Cooperative where touched by the idea of Holly’s bucket list.
They sent her a variety of cheese for us to host a cheese tasting party for her birthday.
She absolutely loved it (as did all the pups), discovering that New York Vintage Cheddar was her favorite.
How could we tell?
When Holly really loved something her eyes would get super big.
They were the biggest for that cheese.
We just want to say thanks again to Cabot for creating that wonderful memory for our family.
Holly got to have an outdoor movie night here at home (that will be another post some time) where she snuggled up to me and watched movies with lots of yummy snacks.
Her last weeks were wonderful as we continued to check off her bucket list items.
She was happy and perky and actually quite active.
Last weekend she tromped through the pumpkin patch smelling the smells and roaming around.
The next day walking almost 3 miles no problem at a Walk for the Animals.
As some of you know Wednesday night she collapsed.
If you subscribe to my email you know this because we did send out a plea for help for funds, which I was embarrassed to have to do, so much so I forgot the link and people had to tell me I didn’t include it.
I was touched by the kind words and donations but also saddened at some mean words and letting me know they were not following my blog anymore due to this tacky act, I really could have done without that.
She died in my arms yesterday.
Peaceful and surrounded by my husband and I.
We brought blankets from home that smelled like home. We brought her pillow she always sat on.
We had gone that morning and bought a small topiary tree and strung lights on it so we could bring the joy of the Christmas tree to her one more time.
She was smiling staring at her tree all the way to the end.
She was happy and hungry right to the end and learned that she really loved chocolate ice cream, a vet friend suggested this to us saying that every dog she ever had to let go got that as a last meal and loved it….and boy was she right. Holly polished off ¼ of a pint of chocolate ice cream with the look of my goodness mom where has this been all my life on her happy face.
She was only with us a little more than a year, yet the love she shared with us was enough to last a lifetime.
We miss you, sweet angel.
You truly were the bestest.
We know you are smiling down at us.
DL says
Peabody my heart breaks for you all. We had a doggy fight congestive heart failure and experienced much of the same. So sorry for your loss. Know though, that Holly was a very lucky girl and the last year of her life was amazing and filled with so much love – thank you for rescuing her!
Peabody says
I’m so sorry you had to go through all that too.
Cassie says
RIP sweet Holly!
Rosa says
I’m ever so sorry for your loss. Terrible.
Hugs,
Rosa
Victoria says
I’m so sorry for your loss. We just lost one of our cats on Monday to a tumor on his pancreas and intestines, so your story with Holly really got to me. Sounds like y’all had quite the year together. Much love.
Karen says
I am so so sorry. I am glad that you got to have Holly for even a short time and even more glad that Holly got to have you.
Mia says
Those damn dogs break your heart.
You guys gave her a happy life.
Xoxo…
Liz S. says
My deepest thoughts and prayers are with you, Peabody – Holly was so lucky to be part of such a loving family. I don’t know if you remember Kiwi (my Sheltie – had her for 12 years, before Chooey. She was a big part of my blog), but she was in an oxygen tank for the last 2 weeks of her life (I remember sharing photos of that, with her little IV and everything, on my blog). I will never forget what the team of vets said – “You can let her go now with dignity, or prolong the inevitable.” Know that Holly will forever be grateful for how well you took care of her xoxo
Teri Giese says
.😢.Am so tearful right now.So sad,yet happy for you that you were blessed with knowing your little one,if even for a short time.Animals bring out the love and goodness in the best of people!What a sweet little baby you had!Cherish the memories and know that her time with you and your husband,were no doubt,the greatest in her little life!She was as blessed to have you,as you were to have her.Be at peace little one,and God bless you for doing all that you did for her.
Judy says
What a lovely tribute! She was a lucky dog to have you care for her in her final year.
JennB says
I’m so sorry for your loss and that you had to even deal with unkind people during all of this. I’ve loved reading so much about her bucket list you guys have been doing and the putting up the Christmas tree for her was my favorite part. Clearly you and your husband are very kind hearted, loving people and made little Holly’s time with you AMAZING for her. It’s easy for me to say to ignore the rudeness but instead I’m coming out of years of reading and not commenting to send you love from my heart to yours. ✨
Maryanne says
Please accept my condolences and be assured that there is a special place in heaven for your sweet baby dog.
Ella says
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m sure Holly would thank you for making her year so wonderful. All dogs should be so lucky…
Heather says
I’m so happy that she came out of her shell and was able to blossom and be a happy pup in her final days. What a testament of your love for her! I’m sorry this happened so soon. One year is not long enough, but no matter how long we have them we always want more time.
Love you Pea.
xo
Lorri Smith says
So sorry for your loss, but thankful for your kind heart.
Martha says
I am so so sorry for your loss. I am also in awe of the love and dedication you showed Holly. She was a lucky dog.
Erika says
What you did was awesome. It takes a special kind of person to take in animals with health problems. The love and devotion you gave that dog was beautiful. You are doggie saints . Anybody that tries to tell you otherwise can go screw themselves.
Victoria says
Peabody, my heart breaks for you. No one should have harsh words thrown at them in the midst of the most painful time. Pups are our kids and sometimes we just need a little help. Wish I could hug you. Please know that this lurker loves your blog but loves your sweet heart even more. Stay kind sweet lady.
Taylor says
I’m sorry for your loss, my thoughts are with you. My childhood dog died a few years ago and I still think about him.
JulieD says
I’m so sorry! I keep thinking about you this week and this past weekend. Sending you lots of love from afar. She was loved but I know this doesn’t make it any easier.
<3 <3
Ginger says
I admire you both so much for what you do for the little one’s. I think your all special and very lucky to have each other. My thoughts are with you and i know Holly was loved and very happy. She is at peace now and whole. She had a really good year thanks to you & your husband. She will be missed by all and thank you for giving totally of yourself to us and sharing. For those that thought you did wrong, i just have to say that they should just have a fraction of the heart & love that you do. Please keep posting.
Katie F. says
Oh Peabody, I’m so sorry for your little family. My husband and I have only had dogs so far, and having not grown up with dogs, it was especially hard for me to let our Sammie-girl go at only 4 years old.
I hate that people tried to make you feel bad for askin for assistance. What’s the point of having a loyal following if you can’t ask for just a tiny little bit back once in a blue moon? Put those people out of your mind and focus on how you and your husband did right by Holly.
Hang in there, and when all else fails, remember her most derp-tastic moments. That helped me.
Love,
Katie
Sarah S says
I am so sorry for your loss, and I am sorry that some people felt the need to pile onto that loss by commenting about your fundraising efforts. I don’t understand why people do that. Losing a pup is losing a member of the family, and you should do everything you can to make their time here peaceful and happy, and you did that. My furbaby is 10, and he isn’t slowing down yet, but I do think about it, and it breaks my heart. Stay strong. I love reading your stories and recipes.
Ellen says
My sympathy on the loss of Holly-Belle. It is never easy to say good-bye to our furry family, no matter how long we have them. You have done an amazing job of caring and loving for this sweet pup. Never feel that you need to explain your choices to anyone, there will always be people ready to criticize anything you do. While many people visit your blog it doesn’t give them the right to dictate your choice of content. Skip the negative comments and take comfort in the many positive ones. Soldier on!
Jason says
So sorry to hear about your little one. We foster hard-luck kittens and it is never easy to lose any of them. I think the hardest time for any parent (furry creatures or otherwise) is to watch them go into the sunset. When you are a foster, you know it is going to happen, and you do your best to prepare for it. But, inevitably, each time those last moments are upon you, it is like a brand new experience. This year was a particularly hard year, as a new variant of distemper seems to be in the air. Normally, we lose about a couple a year. This year, we are already at a dozen. You do your best to be strong, but after this year, it is hard to imagine what next year will bring. The one thing this year has taught us is to really take advantage of loving on them. No amount of love is too much, which is what it sounds like you gave. For the same reason we foster, you chose to give this little one the best bucket-list year of her life. The best gift you gave in love was in the last moments. It is never easy to watch them pass, but passing in the arms of love is the most loving way to go. Our thoughts are with you in a tough time. Just know you made a world of a difference to little Holly.
laura says
I’m so sorry for your loss.
blessings
~*~
Heidi says
I have a King Charles Spaniel and I love him so much. I’m terrified of something happening to him. I know this breed often has heart issues and that scares me. After I read your post, it brings that fear back again. I cried and cried while I read it. But the tears are for you and the heartache you must have felt. I can only imagine the hurt. I’m so sorry you had to experience that but wow, you gave her the best end of life lovin ever. That is so special. I can tell you and your hubby filled her last year with tons of love.
I love it when you post about your “babies”! They are all so adorable . I hope you are feeling a little better.
Miranda says
I am so sorry for your loss. I had a cavalier that passed away a few years back and it was such a devastating loss for our family 🙁
Cakelaw says
Holly was such a beautiful girl. So sorry for your loss. I am sure she appreciated all the wonderful things you did for her in her last days.